Seven ways to become a crabby broke-ass — part two

[For part one of this article, see the blog post for Monday, December 8.]

Our third suggestion is to be sure to treat all your clients or customers as consumers, and nothing more. They are simply a source of money. Your sole goal is to reach into their wallets (figuratively or digitally please!); not to truly provide value or a service. Your objective is to get those rubes to part with their dollars. That’s what you believe capitalism at its core speaks to you. Dollar signs are where it’s at. If you fix this belief firmly in your mind, it may help you trundle along the path towards the welfare line.

Here is a fourth idea: create a business where your marketing plan starts with, “contact your family and friends . . .” After all, there is no better way to riches that those which commence by pushing your product or service on those 150 persons in your life that you consider most precious. It doesn’t matter that they don’t need what you have to offer; their purpose is to support you (in other words, pay you) in your quest to start a business. If you don’t believe this, re-read our third reason above.

Once you have started your business, the fifth way to become unhappy and financially destitute may be to work all the time. Work-life balance is a myth for the actual entrepreneur, isn’t it? Keep that nose to the grindstone! There’s nothing wrong with all-nighters, and don’t be distracted by those that tell you that working too hard is actually working stupid. If you’re not making enough money, the only solution is to work harder. Don’t stop and look at how you’re working, or processes or strategies that you’re employing in your business. Just go-go-go!

How about this sixth technique to entrepreneurial non-success: create a website, and let the world beat a path to your door. After all, there’s only perhaps slightly more websites than human beings alive on this planet now. And, why would it matter that your site turns up on page 66 of a web search? Throw up that website, and watch the dollars flow in.

The seventh key in this approach to oblivion is to search for the one person that has the one answer. Want to know how to do content marketing? Create the best and most effective website? How to price your goods or services? Search 20 gurus on any of these topics, and you will likely find 20 different answers. Which one is right? Sadly, if you spend your time looking for the single, right answer, for all situations, you will realize that with respect to the new paradigm of creating and running successful businesses, there truly are 50 shades of gray. If you wait until you believe you have found the one right answer, you will never launch your business, or will be constantly changing your business plan on a nano second basis. But don’t worry, lack of consistency is a cool way to be a smiling millionaire isn’t it?

I hope our seven ways have truly inspired you. Inspired you to think through some ways that perhaps are less effective to trod upon during your entrepreneurial quest. I think you understand of course that this is tongue-in-cheek, and none of this is to be taken as gospel or advice to you.

But let me leave you with one way to truly avoid being a crabby broke-ass:

Realize that you don’t need to know all the answers; instead, learn how to ask the right questions.

Simple but true.

Here’s to your success!

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