How to Get it Done in ‘21

© 2020 Ann Babiarz & Associates LLC

The Resolution Revolution

Change your thoughts, change your energy, change your world! 

I hope this finds everyone happy, healthy, enjoying the holiday season and looking forward to more joy and more fun in ‘21!

How many times have you set about the New Year with a list of resolutions and the best of intentions to accomplish them only to break them in a few weeks?   Did you know that well over 50% of people who set New Year’s resolutions every year do not achieve their goals?

Changing your thoughts is the first step in changing your life.  Bringing your dreams into focus is a solid step in creating a life that you love.  When you begin to think differently, your entire world begins to change.   You actually become a different person!  You will begin to see things differently.  Dr. Wayne Dyer said it best when he titled his book, “You’ll See it When You Believe It.”

How important you think you are is the most important statement about you, your character, your personality and the results that you get in your life.  How much you like, respect and value yourself determines your level of happiness, health and self-confidence.   How do you treat yourself?   Where are you on your list?

One of the most prevalent ways in which we give away our power is through believing our worst reviews, or low self-esteem.  When we struggle with low self-esteem it causes us to make decisions in which we give our power away.  Who are the beneficiaries of our generosity?  To name just a few:

• Addictive Substances
• Bosses
• Doctors
• Gremlins
• Lovers
• Money
• Parents
• Politicians

 If you do not value who and what you are, you will look outside of yourself for your self-worth.  You will refer to others whom you deem more knowledgeable than you for validation.  You do this, of course, when you forget that everything you can know about being on the right path for you is inside.

Action is the next important element in becoming your best you and living your best life.  One of the most outwardly identifiable characteristics of successful people is that they are continually taking action to move in the direction of their predominant goals.  What actions are you taking to create the life that you dream of? The more someone fails, the more they succeed, it’s all about action.

Another element of success is focus.  What are you thinking and talking about most of the time?   Are you putting your words, energy and thought toward the things that you want in your life, or toward the things that you don’t want in your life?  Whatever you think about, most of the time, is what you will find showing up in your life, whether positive or negative.

What expectations do you have?  Your expectations will determine your attitude.  If you are approaching a situation with the expectation that you will fail, it’s unlikely that you will try very hard to change the outcome.  If you expect that you will succeed, you will likely take actions to determine that you do.

How are you using your time?  In Bonnie Raitt’s “Nick of Time” she said “life gets precious when there’s less of it to waste.”  Time is a gift.  How are you enjoying your present?  Everyone has 24 hours in each day to spend, save, or waste.  The beauty of living in these times is that we’ve added 15 years to our lifespan!   What changes would you be committed to making to create the life that you want?

How many thoughts of resolution have you already entertained for the year 2021? How would you like to take your life from BOOHOO to BOOYAH by following through on your resolutions this year?

Who do you want to be in 2021? Where do you want to go in 2021?  How will your life be different if you make the changes necessary to go from where you are to where you want to be in the next year?  If you can answer these questions for 2021-FANTASTIC.  If you can’t, and you couldn’t in previous years, it’s no wonder you didn’t accomplish what you set out to.  You may not have determined your motivators, which is another critical step in making a change.

Sharpen your focus by defining first where you are and second where you want to be in the following areas: 

• Physical Health and Well-Being
• Finances
• Career
• Friends, Family, Love, Romance, Pets
• Fun and Recreation
• Living Space
• Art and Creativity
• Personal Growth/Spirituality

If you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there!

George Harrison, “Any Road”, Brainwashed, 2002

English singer & songwriter (1943 – 2001)

Be Grateful

A grateful heart is an open door to the universe.  Adding a daily practice of gratitude will keep your heart open and your focus on the positive.

Grant Forgiveness, No Permission Required

When I was a project manager in the corporate world, the expression, ask forgiveness and not permission was the mantra of the successful project managers.  Here, instead of asking for it, you are granting it.

Granting forgiveness to those in your life who may have disappointed you as well as forgiveness to yourself if you’ve disappointed is one of the best things that you can do to make a joyous and fun 2021.

Imagine taking the weight of everyone that you have forgiven off your shoulders.  How freeing is that?  What better way to start the year than by feeing yourself of unnecessary baggage!

The Why

Why are you committed to make this change?  Is it because you want to change or because someone else wants you to change? What are the risks, costs, and benefits to making this change? What are the risks, costs and benefits to not making the change?

The How

Often times, one of the most daunting parts of making a change is that it may seem overwhelming.  Breaking your resolution down into manageable, specific, and achievable steps and marking them off as you complete them will help you to notice the progress that you are making and will keep you motivated.

The Who

Sometimes when we are defining the how, we will find ourselves also defining who can help us in making the change.  Creating a sense of accountability by making your resolution known to your coach, your family, your friends or your co-workers will keep you focused on your goals.

Be Gentle with Yourself

According to Brian Tracy, the law of habit largely determines your future.  This law states that probably 95% of everything that you do is based upon your habits.  Good habits are hard to form, but easy to live with.  Bad habits are easy to form, but hard to live with.  Decide upon the habits that are most supportive of your success and work on developing them until they become automatic.  In my research, I have found that it takes between 21 and 28 days to establish a new habit.

If you do experience any lapses, don’t waste energy on the “beat up” process.  It does not mean that you have missed your mark.  Refocus on your motivators (keep your eye on the ball) and continue to move forward.

Here are a few more pointers for successful behavior change:

• Believe that you are able to change.
• Take responsibility for your actions.  Don’t waste your valuable resources or zap your personal power on excuse making or self-blame.
• Concentrate on the process, not necessarily the results.  Sometimes we make good decisions but due to circumstances beyond our control, the result isn’t what we hoped.
• Understand your what and your why.
• Define why your resolution is important.

Breaking Resolve

People break their resolutions for many different reasons.  As a coach, one of the prevalent reasons I see for those who have broken their resolve is the tendency to give their power away.   We are next going to explore some of the ways in which this happens.  It’s time to go within and examine how you are using your personal power. With conscious examination, you may find ways to boost your personal power and to use it more efficiently or you may find that you are giving your power away altogether. Can you imagine Comed or BP having a sale on gas or electric or for that matter, giving it away?  We humans give our power away all the time.  That’s right: we don’t even sell it! 

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