Horror movies have always been a Hollywood staple. Sometimes, the film maker intends to truly shock and horrify us, like in Silence of the Lambs.* Sometimes, the picture is a campy takeoff of a horror film, such as Sharknado.** And then there are films that were purportedly serious, but wind up unintentionally humorous. Plan 9 from Outer Space, anyone? ***
Chaos can seem like a horror flick. Or, it can be exciting times that create turmoil. In either case, as you tally the numbers from a stress assessment scale, or simply feel your anxiety build, you need planning and preparation for the day when chaos visits you, your family, your business or your home. You need to lower the stress and anxiety level. Here are three ideas:
First, remember that although chaos is rarely funny at the time, you will likely laugh at it at some point in the future. You know this is true. Think of how many things in your past that seemed like a disaster that are now humorous. So if something will eventually be funny, is there any way, without discounting the seriousness of your situation, that you can find some levity in your current holy mess from which you can laugh? ****
You know the studies that show humor lowers blood pressure, relieves stress, and leads to a happier, healthier life. I don’t need to cite those for you. Furthermore, feeling angry, morose or frustrated won’t relieve the pain or confusion of chaos. Can you change your thoughts and change your life?
Second, remember that you will never know all the answers, or all the right ways to solve your problems, extricate yourself from difficult situations, or plug the leaks. What you need to do is ask questions. Never stop asking questions. And never stop probing, looking for the right questions to pose.
Sometimes you will find your answers through your own research, whether web-based or sticking your nose in an old-fashioned book.
Sometimes you will consult with experts, from lawyers to coaches to consultants.
Sometimes, as many famous metaphysicians espouse, you will find that the answers are already within you.
But with any of the foregoing, if you don’t query correctly, you can’t calm the chaos.
My third and final point draws upon an experience my husband had several years back. In addition to a past career in law, and his present calling as author, speaker and consultant, he is a professional jazz musician. Back when we lived up north, he once had a gig playing with a large combo, comprised primarily of inexperienced players, together with the leader of the group, a savvy and talented piano player.
As he tells it, the closing number at that gig was a mess. The saxophone came in at the wrong time. The trumpet was slightly out of tune. The drummer started the tune at too quick a tempo, and some of the other players struggled to perform the technical passages at the quicker pace.
The piano player patted the top of his head and nodded at my husband, alternating points of his finger between the two of them. This meant he wanted both to play the “head” of the song, or the melody, the last time through.
They finished off the song in good fashion. The piano player arose with a flourish, strode to the front of the stage, turned around and made a motion for the whole band to bow and acknowledge the crowd.
The audience cheered and clapped loudly.
The moral here is that even amongst chaos — here a jazz piece rapidly spiraling out of control — if there is one person who remains calm, others can latch upon that rock and pull it together. And, sometimes much good can come from even challenging situations.
You must find humor from within the tumult. You must know to ask questions — lots of questions. But you must also look for someone that can act as a guide, your Sherpa through the mountains and valleys of your disaster. Even if an avalanche is imminent, or a song is being played poorly, a rescue at the last minute or an after-the-fact recovery can always be accomplished by one in the know.
Things spin almost out of control . . . and it is okay.
* Uti, K., Saxon, E. & Bozman, R., (producers) & Demme, J. (director) (1991) Silence of the Lambs, (motion picture) United States, Orion Pictures.
** Latt, D.M., (producer) & Levin, T. (director) (2013) Sharknado, (made-for-television film) United States, SyFy Films.
*** Wood, E., Thomas Jr., H., Burg, C. & Reynolds, J.E., (producers) & Wood, E., (director) (1959) Plan 9 from Outer Space, (motion picture) United States, Valiant Pictures.
**** A terrific song from a very funny (albeit offensive or sacrilegious to some) movie — Monty Python’s Life of Brian — is the closing tune, Always Look on the Bright Side of Life. Warning: this may not be suitable for younger or more sensitive persons: Click here to watch.