We know of bullying. Whether in the school or the workplace or other venue, bullying is now much in the news. Does bullying extend to NFL locker rooms? It will be interesting to see how the convoluted situation in Miami plays out.
Bullying can be emotional, verbal, physical or cyber. The bully uses force, threats or coercion, or even insidious mind games to abuse, intimidate or impose domination over the victim. It is an intentional act.
Can one negligently bully another? Rather than intentionally perpetrating acts of aggression, can one carelessly do so?
Consider this. You are with your group, your clan, your tribe, or your boys (or girls). You are all quite comfortable with each other and like to engage in good-natured ribbing or kidding. At least you believe the ribbing is good-natured. One member of your group doesn’t feel the same way.
Perhaps you are interacting with a new acquaintance at a social gathering and find (you think) a kindred spirit who enjoys banter. Too late you realize the bantering has gone too far.
Is this negligent bullying? Is there even such a thing? We will leave these queries for social scientists to ponder.
Nevertheless, we’ve all made a social faux pas from time to time. Is there a way we can try to avoid the accidental arrow or sling? One method by which we increase awareness of these scenarios is to increase our emotional intelligence.
Those with high levels of E. Q. or emotional intelligence quotient, are able to understand and respond to their own emotions and those of others. If these folks say or do something perceived as abusive or intimidating to another, they recognize this, and can choose to rectify the situation.
The good news is we know that E. Q. can be strengthened. You can hone your ability to identify, assess and control your own emotions, and those of others with whom you interact. Moreover, higher levels of E. Q. are tied to greater success in work, in relationships, and in life in general.